Friends please be up and standing for the cutting of the cake. The cake was baked by or Matron of Honor Meagan McGregor with her own fair and surprisingly strong hand and she†™ll be round your tables to make sure you all have your share. For those unfortunate souls who are on a diet, tonight†™s not your night. `Gentlemen and gentlewomen! Could we have your attention for a moment for the cutting of the cake. (Dinner is served) Cutting of the Wedding Cake `Ladies and Gentlemen, please take your seats as we hear a few words a prayer of thanks for God†™s grace from our host, the Father of the Bride – Brian Walker!†™ Dinner (wide applause) Father of the Bride†™s Speech and a Prayer of Grace As for the groom, look at him! He scrubs well for a guy who gets into football brawls, doesn†™t he? Ladies and Gentleman, a big hand for Winona and Derek!†™. `And now the big moment, Ladies and Gentleman, our bride and groom Winona and Derek! Doesn†™t she look beautiful? She†™s been practising her bouquet-throwing and hopes to give a good account of herself when the moment comes. Let†™s have a big hand for Alan our third groomsman.†™ Entrance of the Bride and Groom It†™s amazing the things that bring people together. `Our last groomsman, Alan Peterson has known our Groom, Derek ever since they got arrested for brawling at a football match over ten years ago. A big hand for our second Groomsman! ‘ (applause) Third Groomsman Jimmy also did our bride†™s hair tonight. Imagine a cross between Salvador Dali and Edward Scissorhands. Our Jimmy†™s a hairdresser who specializes in some of the more exotic punk rock styles you might see in the music industry. Don†™t anyone let him near a microphone tonight, folks. His interests are rap music and wrestling. He†™s single, six foot four and 250 pounds. Michael, or Junior as big brother Derek calls him, is seventeen. `Our first groomsman is Michael McGregor Junior. Hope you catch the bouquet Daniela.†™ (wide applause) First Groomsman This is her twelfth time as a bridesmaid and she†™s running out of wardrobe space. `Our last bridesmaid has watched `Twenty Seven Dresses†™ five times. Let†™s hear it for Mary Jo.†™ (more applause) Third Bridesmaid `Our second bridesmaid, Mary Jo Zimakowski has known Winona since they were in high school together and as usual, Mary Jo says she has Winona†™s back. Let†™s hear it for wee Emmeline!†™ (wide applause) Second Bridesmaid Gentlemen, Emmeline is single and taking a break from her career as a ballerina to concentrate on bringing home a gold medal at the next Olympics for gymnastics. `So without further ado and just a little nepotism, we have Winona†™s younger sister Emmeline Walker our first bridesmaid. If the Bride and Groom chickened out, it†™d be two of you tying the knot in their place! There†™s a sobering thought.†™ First Bridesmaid They are the understudies for the Bride and Groom. `Now we come to the Bridesmaids and Groomsmen. Let†™s hear it for Orlando.†™ (wide applause) (The Bridesmaids and Groomsmen) We can†™t wait for his speech and wise counsel. He also assures us, he really is the best man. He†™s there to put his body on the line for his best friend. The Best Man isn†™t just there to pass the ring to the groom. `Now we come to our Best Man, Ladies and Gentlemen, Orlando Jones by name. A tremendous grip on the woman as well! Let†™s hear it for Auntie Meagan.†™ (wide applause) Best Man In Meagan†™s case, she†™s also the Bride†™s Auntie. It†™s been said that Meagan is chosen for her ability to outthink, outrun and generally outwrestle anything with up to eight legs that stands in the way of a smooth-running wedding. `And now we come to the Matron of Honor, Meagan McGregor. A big hand for Michael & Maria McGregor, Parents of the Groom.†™ Matron of Honor Derek†™s parents just got back from trekking in Nepal to be here for their son†™s wedding. `And now, here come the parents of the groom, looking happy and proud. I†™m not saying which, you both look wonderful tonight.†™ (wide applause) Parents of the Groom As you all know, the day your little girl gets married is the happiest day of the century for every doting parent and don†™t they look radiant? Thank you Brian & Lily Walker, we can see where the bride got her good looks from. Put your hands together for our hosts, the mother and father of the bride. Please be on your feet as we welcome the bridal party. Introduction of the Wedding Party Parents of the Bride
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